how to get yourself motivated

for an ADHD person, thinking can be your worst enemy. i give the following advice, for free:

don’t sit around and wait for motivation, it isn’t coming. just get up and start.

don’t think about what you’re going to do, or what order things will be done in, or write lists so you don’t forget (you know you’ve never remembered to check your list, besides, how could you? you’ve lost your notebook and let’s not get started on the disappearing pens).  just do something.

you actually can finish the job. your mind strays everywhere but your body doesn’t have to. if you can’t fix your focus, fix yourself physically; for instance, kneel on a stool to do the dishes. sit on the floor to fold washing. you are more than capable of getting it done, just remember that it’s so.

i hope this helps.

post scriptum: i’ve just decided that it’s okay for me to put unfolded washing away in the drawers because it beats leaving it in a pile. better never stops!

an open letter to chloe swarbrick

dear chloe

what is it like to be the voice of reason in a tempestuous sea of insanity?

my family could be the poster group for adhd. we are six; four daughters and two parents all with adhd, all diagnosed later in life, at ages 54, 44, 27, 25, 21 and 14. you can imagine our homes growing up. we lived on the same street as our school but were always late, could never find our hairbrushes, always had grubby clothes… the list goes on ad infinitum. none but our father has ever found a path; how did you do it? we are proud of you.

there’s a grief and sometimes a bitterness about the situations of those of us who have not achieved what you have. me, i’m not really anything. i do often wonder what life might have been like. could i have won the itm supersprint? don’t know, i never learnt how to drive a car. an olympic medalist? never done any sports, nor can i swim. an au pair in gay paree? i never finished learning to speak french. a winner of the melbourne cup? never been on a horse. a university professor in classics? i forgot all my latin after my master’s degree. yet another list goes on…

how does one go forward successfully when they can’t go back and fix it all? one simply does, because it beats the alternative. but just getting by isn’t good enough: the neurodiverse deserve equal quality of life. how do we get there? make it your career.